Saturday, November 20, 2010

"Adoption came about because of brokenness . . . "

An anonymous commenter recently called me an "evil bitch," and suggested that hell was holding a special place for me, because my family is pursuing an adoption.  As Lora Lynn at Vita Familiae concedes, adoption is complicated at best:

Let’s begin with this:  Adoption is messy.  The idea behind adoption is beautiful.  But adoption came about because of brokenness.  Because of our fallen world.  Injustice is inevitable within such a framework.  Heartbreak is part and parcel to adoption.  We knew this on an intellectual level when we started.  But to have felt it, to have lived some of the injustice, the waiting, the loss… and knowing we’ve only barely tasted one side of the story… It feels overwhelming.

Read the rest here.

20 comments:

marie therese 1 said...

Hi! You most certainly are doing something right! When we come close to the line drawn in the sand at the gates of hell, the enemy comes out of the woodwork to harass us. I continue to pray for your courageous Christian openness and vulnerability. There are many who want and need to hear this great "song of God's Tender Mercy." You continue to amaze and minister such to me. Peace and blessings.

Pentimento said...

Marie Therese, a million thanks. You can't know how much these words mean to me; I'll try to remember them! God bless you.

Marc Puckett said...

Just found Pentimento via your latest post at VN, which was a great read; thanks. That you are adopting is a wonderful thing, particularly in the face of the ideological/institutional/bureaucratic nonsense that attaches itself to the process these days. Courage!

Pentimento said...

Thank you, Marc.

Rodak said...

Wait... What am I missing here? According to what kind of warped mind-set is adoption a bad thing?

Pentimento said...

Rodak, it's pretty convoluted, but the context for the anonymous commenter's remark was a pro-abortion argument. She (I assume it was a she) made a comment on a post I wrote about the proposed bill before the NYC Council to regulate crisis pregnancy centers, and her point was something like, Catholic Charities used to snatch the babies of unwed mothers away in the sixties, so by supporting adoption I am cooperating with evil. This is not the first time I've heard this argument, and it always ends with the affirmation that abortion is much better than adoption, as it did in this case. It's really just sad.

That said, and crazily enough, there are also Catholic anti-abortion zealots, but that's another story.

lily of the filed said...

Have you heard of the Sister of Life in NY?

http://missionaryofcharityflowerbud.blogspot.com/2010/11/charism-of-life.html

check my blog, i've got links to the charism of life :D

Keep praying for a wonderful child that you may bring home <3

Pentimento said...

Yes, I know the Sisters of Life well, and several of them are personal friends of mine. Thanks for the link.

Pentimento said...

And thanks for the prayers! :)

Rodak said...

Okay, thanks. It's somewhat disturbing, but I guess that I get it, now.

tubbs said...

I suppose that in the public sphere of the blogosphere, you inevitably run into crazed angry people.

mrsdarwin said...

Ah, the bravery of anonymous commenters, setting us all straight!

Adoption may have come about because of brokenness, but it's also a first step in repairing brokenness.

Pentimento said...

Tubbs, that is so true.

And I agree with you, Mrs. Darwin, as you know.

The Cottage Child said...

Our Enemy loves to make us question every effort, based on the bad behavior of others. We could all just sit on our hands and wait on his instruction, or get about knowing otherwise.

Sweetheart (may I call you Sweetheart?), evil you are not. Thank you for your inspirational ACTION. May God richly bless you, beloved.

Pentimento said...

Yes, you may call me sweetheart, Cottage Child -- thank you! :)

And thank you for your wise words, which are very well put and very true. I really needed to hear and understand that today.

Tertium Quid said...

You must be doing something right. Some of your commentors hate you, and you almost never write on politics.

Pentimento said...

Ha! I never thought of that, TQ. :)

The Sojourner said...

As an adoptive sister who is passionately glad that a certain baby wasn't aborted 4 1/2 years ago but also passionately glad that she didn't stay in her extremely abusive family of origin...I am incoherent at the very thought of adoption as evil.

I'll just offer solidarity in place of eloquent words, how does that sound?

Mrs C said...

Wow. How sad.

Pentimento said...

Mrs. C, I know. I just assumed that the abusive comment represented a howling need for prayer, so I've been praying for her (assuming it's a her).

Sojourner, solidarity sounds good! :)